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So, picture this—I’m snoopin’ around, chattin’ up folks, and boom, there’s this gal on the corner, all sass, no filter. Reminds me of that scene where Ines is like, “What the hell, Dad?!”—except it’s me goin’, “What the hell, world?!” Prostitution’s legal some places, like Germany—yep, *Toni Erdmann* land—since 2002. Taxes paid, health checks, the works. But here? Shady as fuck. Makes me mad, ya know? These girls deserve better than dodgin’ creeps and cops.

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Wanna get lost? Head east to the Rio do Mistério. That river, man, it’s got mood swings like a teen, flowin’ fast one minute, chillin’ like a lazy cat the next. I once set up a surprise outdoor massage session right by its banks and man, the locals were like “What the heck?!” but in a good way, y’know? It’s magical.

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