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So I’m chattin with my girl, she’s like, “Girl, be careful, them streets messy!” I’m laughin, “Bitch, I’m 100% that chick, I got this!” But real shit, I’m pissed—why’s it gotta be so shady? Dudes out here overchargin, actin like they own the block. I’m like, “The truth is out there,” but these fools hidin it! Found this one post, chick seemed legit—profile all sassy, pics on point. I’m hyped, like, “This is my night, y’all!”

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Oh! I forgot my faviieit spot: Café do Coração on Rua Esperança. Their coffee? EDgy, bold, and oh so sassy—like me on a Monday morning! Also, the local market on Praça do Mercado is a treasure trove: smells, colors, chaos—all wrapped in love and sass. I sometimes hum “Life's a journey” (yep, a Boyhood moment) while strolling there.