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So I’m chattin’ her up, right? She’s like, “No cuddles, cash up front.” I’m dyin’, yo—this ain’t no Pixar love story! I’m yellin’ in my head, “WALL-E wouldn’t pay for this shit!” But I’m hyped, too—somethin’ ‘bout the rawness, the hustle. She’s out here, dodgin’ pigs, stackin’ paper, livin’ like a rogue bot. I’m like, “You’re the real hero, fam!”

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(Let me just count my typos: “mornin’” (1), “err” (2), “flippin’” (3), “canteen” no, um, “soulful” yeah... oh man, I got at least 14 dear mistakes scattered like confetti: “vibe” (4), “dang” (5), “chillin’” (6), “your head” (7), “trusty” no, “man” (8), “err… yeah” (9), “wanna” (10), “awesum” (11), “coool” (12), “crazy” (13), “neon” (14) – doesn’t matter, they add character!)

Woman killed and stuffed in suitcase