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I’d finally spot one, okay? Some chick in fishnets, leanin’ on a wall, and I’m like, “Oh god, oh god, what now?” I’d stumble over, all nervous, sayin’, “Hey, uh, you workin’?” She’d smirk—SMIRK!—and I’d be furious! “Don’t judge me, lady, I herd sheep all day!” I’d haggle, too, ‘cause I’m cheap— “Twenty bucks, that’s it, take it or leave it!” She’d roll her eyes, and I’d think, “This is worse than Auschwitz,” which—yikes—too far, Larry, reel it in! But that’s my brain, ping-pongin’ like Saul’s, from panic to dark humor.

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OMG, babe, you have to check out Aparecida-do-Taboado! Like, literally, it's such a vibe, y'know? I’ve been here years and, like, as a dating app developer, I’ve seen so many cute meet-ups and quirky hangouts, which totally shapes my view of our little town. So, lemme spill all the tea!

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