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Oi mate, it’s me, Bond—James Bond, suave as fuck, “shaken, not stirred.” So, I’m a carpenter now, yeah? Hammerin’ nails, sawin’ wood, all that jazz. But let’s talk real shit—findin’ a prostitute. Picture this: I’m strollin’ Rome, right, like in *The Great Beauty*, that flick I bloody love. “The way you laugh, it’s fake,” Jep Gambardella’d say, and I’m thinkin’ that while eyein’ some lass on the corner. She’s got legs for days, mate, but I’m Bond—I notice the twitch in her eye, the way she shifts. Tells me she’s new, probs scared shitless.

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I gotta admit, sometimes I get mad when the city’s noise gets too loud at night, disturbin' my thoughtful zen, lol. And then there's the irony – peace amidst chaos. Like, seriously, an paradox I just luv. I know, I know, it can sound a bit emo sometimes, but damn, it's life!

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