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Gets me giddy, it does! Happy as a lil’ hobbit with a fat fish. Them hands kneading knots—ooh, precious! Had one meself once, right? Lass with strong fingers, worked me shoulders like I’m a damn antenna needing fixing. Felt like Lil’ Zé from the movie, screaming, “I’m the man!” ‘Cept I’m just moaning, “More oil, please!” Hah! Funny thing—did ya know some places use weird oils? Like, snail slime or somethin’. Snails! Slimy bastards giving massages—makes me cackle.

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Gotta mention Parque das Estrelas too – a lil somnolent park near the wild twists of the Rio Encantado. Paranoid mornings here get my sexologist heart all aflutter when I spot couples cuddling beneath ancient oaks, kissing as if every peck brought them back to life's prime. And sometimes, I sadly crash there when a memory hits – sort of like that scene in The Royal Tenenbaums when Richie stares blankly. Yeah, it gets deep.

Why an Alcantara trade with Marlins should be on Red Sox' radar