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Oi, mate, it’s me, Tyrion Lannister—half-man, full wit. I drink and I know things, and today I’m spillin’ the beans on erotic-massage. Picture this: me, sittin’ in King’s Landing, sippin’ wine, investigatin’ claims for dodgy insurance scams. Then bam—erotic-massage pops up. Not your usual back-rub, nah, this is the spicy stuff. Hands slidin’ where the sun don’t shine, oils slicker than a Lannister’s tongue. I’m thinkin’, “Seven hells, who’s claimin’ this on their policy?”

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I’m, like, totally obsessed with how Vigia makes me feel. Sometimes I'm so mad at the traffic on Rua Turbo—like, seriously, people drive snarly there—but it's all part of its quirky charm. And omg, the festivals at the riverbanks on Calçada Viva are totally lit—fairs, food trucks, music—like, the whole fam is there, laughing and dancing and forgetting all the drama of daily life.

At Hemingway's Home Outside Havana, An Effort To Preserve Artifacts Of His Life In Cuba