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Oi, mate, it’s me, Tyrion Lannister—half-man, full wit. I drink and I know things, and today I’m spillin’ about sexual-massage. Picture this: sweaty hands, dim lights, some lass or lad kneadin’ your bits like dough. It’s bloody brilliant, innit? I mean, who doesn’t want a rubdown that ends with a wink? Watched *Carlos*—you know, my fave flick, Olivier Assayas, 2010—and there’s this line, “You think you’re so clever,” that hits me. Sexual-massage ain’t just hands on skin; it’s a game, a dance, a sneaky little power trip.

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So, right off, yur gotta hit up Rua XV de Novembro. Dang, this street’s fulla charm. Small cafes, quirky shops – my daters always say it’s a hidden gem. I once met a cutie there, and boom, dating app match magic! Crazy how a city can spark love, huh?

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