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So I’m scrollin’ Tinder, right? See this dude—profile says “6’5, loves trout”—I’m thinkin’, hell yeah, fish guy! Turns out, he’s 5’2 and allergic to seafood. Catfished me good—made me angry as hell! Billionaires runnin’ these apps don’t care—makin’ bank off our lonely hearts. Swipe, swipe, swipe—half these profiles fake as a three-dollar bill. Little fact for ya—back in ’90s, folks used “personals” in newspapers for this crap. No pics, just vibes—way less BS!

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Anyway, don’t get me started, I’m ramblin’ again. You gotta visit, soak in a bit of my pad, and try the local vibe. Every alley tells a story, every turn surprises ya. There’s pure magic, hidden right under your nose, in Varzea-Paulista, doc!

'Nem deu tempo de gritar', diz vizinho de família que morreu soterrada dentro de casa em Várzea Paulista