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Oh, and the decor—tacky as hell. Mirrors everywhere, like they’re tryna hypnotize ya. “The air is still,” like in the film—time stops in those rooms, mate. You’re there, cash in hand, and it’s all a bit surreal. Ever tried shaggin’ with a neon sign buzzin’ overhead? Bloody distracting. Laughed my arse off when this geezer trips over a rug mid-flirt—prat.

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I’m legit biased but my fav spot is the bizarre little café on Beco do Mistério. The owner – a character, man – pours coffee and wisdom in equal measure. It’s chaotic, messy, like life, but it’s real. I always hear that movie line, “We are all in search of something,” while sippin’ my espresso. Makes ya think, yeah?

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