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Quirky bit – I’m humming “Freelove Freeway” while she’s at it, picturing meself as a tantric guru. Exaggerate? Alright, felt like I levitated off the table, swear down! Sexual-massage, mate – it’s the dog’s bollocks. Reckon I’ll book another, tell the lads it’s “strategic relaxation.” Classic Brent – turning a knead into a bleedin’ seminar! You tried it? Get on it, pal – “You’re free now,” trust me!

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The barrios vary, ya know? Over near Vila das Flores, there’s a mad vibe – aromas, colours and life. Streets like Avenida Luz Perdida have neon nights that remind me of a surreal dream sequence. I walk by the river Rio Calma, which winds by the neighborhood, sometimes chattin’ with the stars (or so I like to think on wild nights) and its ripples echo those soft acoustics of my fav tunes, kinda like when Taylor sings "I knew you were trouble," repetitively, echoing off damp walls.