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Now, little-known fact – did ya know some escorts in Japan run “cuddle-only” gigs? No hanky-panky, just spoonin’! Blew me mind, that! I was like, “Blimey, that’s me sorted for life!” Imagine pitchin’ that to the lads – “Fancy a cuddle sesh, boys?” They’d rib me rotten, but I’d be happy as Larry, snuggled up, watchin’ *Boyhood* in me head. “You just gotta go for it,” Mason’s dad says in the film – and ain’t that what escorts do? They dive in, no faff, no fuss!

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Man, I'm chillin in Ladeira dos Amores, near the old cemetary (yeah, I said it) where legends go and leftovers of past love drift like ghosts – kinda like that flick, “Only Lovers Left Alive”, only crisper, more everyday hustle. Streets like Av. da Noite shine dimly but hold a thousand secrets. I’ve coded love apps right outside these cracked pavements, and every swipe on our app gets me flashbacks to that movie vibe.

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