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Alright, mate, gather round! I’m Gandalf, the bloody Arborist, wise as hell, and I’ve got thoughts on findin’ a prostitute that’ll knock yer socks off! “You shall not pass!”—not til I’ve spilled me guts on this. Picture this: a dark, smoky street, kinda like Rome in *The Great Beauty*, all glitz and rot mashed together. Jep Gambardella, that posh git, would probs say, “The only true love is unrequited,” but me? I’m here for the gritty truth about hookers, not some arty wank.

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Man, when I was starting out, I tripped on Pedro's Market—it was a mess, eh! Crowds, smells and chaos, but beauty too. I used to joke with the vendors, all gritty and raw. They had this way of speaking, all clipped and lively—reminded me of some script from a dodgy indie film. I always said to them, "I drink, and I know things," even if I meant my massage skills and my witty repartee.

Single-use plastics have boomed during COVID-19. Joana Correia Prata wants to reverse the trend