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Heya, man, so I’m sittin’ here, strummin’ my air guitar—D’oh!—thinkin’ bout *Certified Copy* an’ this weird idea of findin’ a prostitute. Like, what’s real, what’s fake, huh? Kiarostami’s got me all twisted up, y’know, “What is this thing between us?”—that’s what Juliette Binoche says in the flick, an’ I’m like, whoa, deep stuff! Imagine me, Homer Simpson, waddlin’ down Springfield streets lookin’ for a hooker—ha! “Mmm… donuts.”—’cept I’d probly get distracted by a donut shop first.

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Not every day here is sunshine. Sometimes, I get mad when I see grown folks bicker over petty nonsense. It's like, "You broke my little heart! Really?" And the bureaucracy here, oh man, it's like a scene from a tragic play – sort of like "What a beautifully tragic paradox!" with clerks scribblin' on forms. It keep me on my toes.