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About Fortaleza

Yo, funniest shit? Some dude told me he got a sexual-massage from a chick who didn’t even know it was *that* kinda massage – awkward as hell! She’s all, “Oh, just relax,” and he’s like, “Uh, too relaxed, lady!” Had me dyin’, bro. But real talk, it’s tricky – some spots advertise “massage” and you walk in, boom, happy endin’ menu. Caught me off guard once, I ain’t gonna lie, made me laugh tho. You gotta know the code, fam!

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Now, oh man, check this out: there's a cute park called Parque das Águas. It’s my happy zone. One day, I sat on a worn bench, scribblin’ notes about life while the river, Rio dos Sonhos, gushed along, sparkly and carefree. I even once bumped into a stray dog; we shared a moment and I thumped its head like "Eh, buddy, relax!"

Drought, high temperatures affect next coffee harvest