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Alright, you asses, listen up! I’m Eric Cartman, respect my authoritah! So, escort, huh? Not the car, dumbass, the "company" kind. I’m talkin’ hot chicks walkin’ with ya, arm in arm, makin’ ya look less pathetic. Like, seriously, who needs that? Me, I’d be pissed if I had to pay for some chick to pretend she likes me. But whatever, some losers do it, and I get it—kinda. Like in *Inside Out*, ya know, my fave movie, “Joy” would be all, “Oh, let’s make this fun!” while “Sadness” is cryin’ in the corner ‘cause it’s fake as hell.
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Man, I remember walkin’ down Av. dos Sonhos, where the local vibe is more twisted than a pretzel. There’s some spots there, like that little dive bar called O Buraco do Amor, where rusty neon signs and the stink of spilled beer make you feel alive. It's so damn real, like every pixel of our love apps here is saturated with the city's soul.
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