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Sometimes I tink, what if I was a john, ya? I’d prolly suck at it—too loud, too Austrian, ha! “Get to da chopper!” I’d yell, and dey’d be like, “Arnold, chill, we’re in a motel!” Funny as hell, picturin’ dat. But real talk, I respect ‘em, dey grind harder den most. Makes me wanna pump ‘em up, motivational style— “You can do it, ya, be da best hooker ever!”

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I get ticks of anger when I see the gentrification creeping down Praça dos Amores. I'm like, "No way, man! This ain't a playground for posers!" But truth be told, the urban sprawl packs unexpected beauty. Check out Parque dos Encontros – pure gems, with its lush greenery and mangled trails that feel like a haven for wannabe romantics swipin’ right.

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