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About Rio de Janeiro

So yeah, erotic-massage? It’s a messy, sexy, dodgy game—bit like life, innit? “Where were you when I laid the earth’s foundation?”—fuckin’ poetic, that. Makes me think it’s primal, ancient, dirty in a good way. You tried it? Don’t be a prat—give it a go! Just don’t tell me the gory details, you filthy git!

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Sometimes, I get mad. Like, really mad. When bakers on Avenida Sabor leave their trash near my favorite massage parlor. Bummer! Happy moments? Countless – like when a client tells me, “you make these knots disappear, a magic trick like in A History of Violence!” Cue my inner snark: “Oh, honey, if only you paid as much as you tip!”

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