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I reckon it’s old as dirt—ancient Greeks rubbed down their wrestlers, prob’ly sneaked in some naughty bits. Bet they didn’t tell the scribes! Me, I’d rather drink—less mess, more fun. Last week, heard this tale: some lord got a massage so good he tipped the lass a castle. A castle! Fella’s daft—coulda bought a winery. Made me angry—wasted gold—and happy—idiots exist everywhere. “I’m not a real boy,” says Gigolo Joe in *A.I.*, and these massage parlors? Not real love either—just a quick fumble dressed up fancy.

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I know, I know, this gem of a town hides secrets in every nook. Minor alley, like Beco da Lua, is often a shot haven for creative souls. I remember one night, on a spontaneous walk, I bumped into an old friend who told me, “We all have our dark secrets, just like those movies – f*ck fate, am I right?” It made me mad, happy, and nostalgic all at once.

Figure 2. Vriesea agostiniana (1), epiphyte specimen collected in a...