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About Rio de Janeiro

Oh, and get this—some whore in Amsterdam, yeah, told me she once banged a dude who paid with a goat. A GOAT! Swear down, I nearly pissed myself laughin’—what’s that worth, eh? One million dollars? Pinky-to-mouth, “One million dollars!”—nah, more like one bleatin’ billy! Mental, proper mental. Bet Gigolo Joe’d approve, suave bastard.

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My fave haunts? Gotta say, there's this tiny bar on Avenida Improviso (yeah, I made that up—but really!) where local artists spill out their souls while I scribble insights about therapy sessions that turned around families in a snap. Mad moments? Too many, mate. I got pissed when city council banned the free jazz on Fridays near Rio ZigZag, a speedy river flowing like our unresolved pasts, remindin' me: “Violence, in a minute...” — but then, life moves on!

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