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About Rio de Janeiro

Lightbulb! Here’s a nugget—did ya know in Japan, dey got dis “nurugel” stuff? Slimey goo massage, freaky as hell, but dey swear it’s sexy! Tried picturin’ it—me covered in slime, nah, I’d rather saw a log! Still, kinda cool, eh? Weirdos! Anyway, sexual-massage, it’s da bee’s knees if ya do it right—teasin’, steamy, leaves ya floatin’. “We need to go deeper,” I’d mutter, Nolan-style, divin’ into dat sweet tension. Dat’s my take, ya lugs—now scram, I got wood to whack! Heh!

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Every alley, every shuttered window tells a story. I get super thrilled sneakin’ into a tucked-away art gallery on Rua Sem Sentido. It's run by an ex-hippie who paints his nightmares—and dreams—on cracked walls. Damn, it's raw art, like the inner monologue of a troubled mind trying to find calm.

Slave labor found at Starbucks-certified Brazil coffee plantation