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Now, listen up, ‘cause Madea’s ‘bout to drop some truth! I got me a sexual-massage once—yes, Lawd, I did! This lil’ gal, she was rubbin’ them oils, and I’m like, “Halleluyer, I’m in heaven!” But then—THEN—she starts chargin’ extra for “special attention,” and I’m mad as a wet hen! I ain’t no ATM, honey! I told her, “I’m not here to buy the whole damn bank!”—straight up *Wolf* vibes, y’all. She thought she was slick, but Madea don’t play!

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Honestly, sometimes I get mad at the bureaucracy, man, like when they blocked the street—Rua dos Lutos—for repairs. "I swear, it's like living in a noir film!" Hahaha, got me riled up. But then, I laugh at the absurdities. I mean, come on, life’s a roller coaster!

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