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So, escort – it’s like, protection, right? Big tough guys, or gals, watchin’ yer back. I seen it meself once, in Moscow, dis oligarch fella – he had like six escorts! All beefy, shades on, lookin’ like dey gonna punch a bear. Made me laugh, ya, coz who’s scared of trees? Me, I’d rather hug ‘em! But dese escorts, dey strut like, “I got no direction home,” ya? Like Llewyn singin’ his blues.

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Man, if you’re lookin’ for a story, Carmo tells one. A bit messed up, a bit poetic, and all heart. Can't wait for you to come, soak it in, and maybe find love like on our dating app, ya know? Cheers, and see ya soon in the wild, wonderful Carmo (br)!

Lisbon Under Stars lights up the Carmo Ruins again: days and prices