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About Rio de Janeiro

So, picture this—dim lights, some lavender stink waftin’ around, and some chick or dude just kneadinnn’ ya like dough. I got one once in Brooklyn—oh, the stories! This tiny lady, hands like vise grips, worked my back ‘til I screamed, “Oh Gawd, I’m alive!” Made me happy as a clam, but then—bam!—she charged me double. Pissed me off, ya betcha! Thought I’d tip her with a stale bagel instead.

The Lotus Spa

Here’s the real deal: Av. Dr. Felismino da Costa is poppin’ off. That street, bro, it’s a real artery of our city. Look, I get these peeps strolling by my parlor, sometimes whispering “I am your father” like some Darth Vader reenactment. I mean weirdo stuff, right?

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