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What gets me goin’—the nerve of it all! People judgin’ escorts like they’re holier-than-thou. Makes me wanna scream! I’m over here, yellin’ at my TV, “You ever try datin’ in LA? It’s a nightmare!” Escorts are just cuttin’ through the BS—straight to the point, like Viggo smashin’ that guy’s nose in the diner scene. No small talk, no “how’s the weather”—just, “Here’s the deal, pal.” Efficient! I respect it! But then—then!—you got the creeps who ruin it. Sleazy dudes actin’ like they own ‘em. That pisses me off. I’m like, “Joey, how’s it feel to be a monster?”—y’know, that line from the movie? Fits perfect.

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Now, ya gotta check out Parque dos Sonhos – my fave park here. It’s a lil oasis by the river, with lotsa shady trees and even a little walking trail. I often use it as my thinkin’ spot when I’m not usually bendin’ folks over for a good massage. Sometimes I sit there, thinkin’ life’s like one long massage – you just gotta work out the knots, baby, Halleluyer!

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