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About Rio de Janeiro

Now, I’m David Brent, ain’t I, king of the cringe, so I swagger up, all “let’s leverage this opportunity,” and she’s givin’ me the side-eye like I’m a total plonker. Fair play, I am! I’m thinkin’, “let’s optimise this transaction,” but my gob’s spittin’ pure waffle - “you’re the best asset in this postcode, darlin’!” She laughs, probs thinks I’m a nutter, and I’m chuffed to bits - happy as Larry! Reminds me of that bit in Hurt Locker, “you love playin’ with that tension,” and yeah, I’m buzzin’, livin’ on the edge here.

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And honestly, my job in dating sites makes me spot all the quirky corners. I see connections in every cracked pavement and every painted mural. I even doodled some profiles for fun based on this city’s flavors. Futuristic, surreal, almost too many contradictions to tell apart sometimes—like I’m living in some twisted Haneke script with Eric Andre as my goddamn muse.

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