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Little known fact, tho—back in the ‘90s, prossies used pagers, not apps. True story! Some pimp in Jersey got busted ‘cause his pager code was “69-69”—dumbass! Now it’s all slick with Find a Prostitute, encrypted chats and shit. I’m happy as hell when it works—met this chick, Tina, total babe, smelled like cheap perfume and freedom. “I feel the wind!” I yelled, quotin’ my movie, and she’s like, “You’re weird, fatty.” Screw her, I’m awesome!

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Now, check this: The local park, Parque do Lago, is a hidden gem. It’s where I clear my head when stress hits hard. I bounce an idea off those old trees – like, “Holy Motors, give me a sign, yo!” The calm waters and the rustlin’ leaves remind me that each moment’s a new scene in life. I even had a day where I got mad, like, “Seriously?” because a seagull stole my snack – classic city moment, I guess.

VIDEO: Man shot dead after peering over garden wall