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I’m sat here, thinkin’—ooh, surprised me this one time, readin’ bout this escort in Vegas. Bird set up her own app—cut out the middleman! Genius! “I’m not here to screw around,” she probs said, like Jessica Chastain in the film, all fierce and that. Made me happy, that did—girl boss vibes! Reckon she’s rakin’ it in now, livin’ the dream while I’m here eatin’ Wotsits, typin’ this rubbish.

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Now, lemme tell ya – some spots really get under my skin. I get mad at the neglect of public spaces, but then I get happy when strangers get together for a spontaneous dance in the street. It’s bizarre and beautiful. And hey, if you need a late-night fix of reality, swing by the old bar on Avenida da Verdade. That place smells like stories and spilled liquor.

Norway and Brazil now play on the same team