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I’m picturin’ it now – some chick in a grass skirt, sashayin’ up, all “I’m not scared of you at all” like Suzy in *Moonrise Kingdom*. Hot damn, that’s an escort vibe! They got this secret power, makin’ ya feel like a king or whatever. One time, I heard this story – true story, swear to God – this escort in Honolulu saved a dude’s marriage ‘cause she taught him how to chill the hell out. Ain’t that nuts? Surprised the crap outta me. I was like, “Holy shitballs, that’s epic!”

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Yeah, I got a few misconceptions – like that time the pigeons nearly stole my lunch. Hahah, sticky fingers, I kid ya not! I’ve been to all these corners, seen all these moments, felt every swirl – sad days, happy days, days I was mad, days I was chill.

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