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Sometimes – I’m quirky. Hummin’ tunes mid-massage. Therapist’s like – “dude, what?” Hilarious. Sarcasm kicks in – “oh, *real* professional.” Keeps it light. Sexual-massage ain’t stiff – pun intended. Gotta laugh – or it’s awkward. Worst part? Overpriced spots – $200? Robbery! Still – I’m hooked. You try it – tell me. Bet ya can’t quit. Like me – and *The Assassin*. Obsessed!

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So, first up, there's the heart of town. Look, in the city center near "Knyaz Aleksandar I" street (yeah, I know, what a long name, right?) there's that cool little café where I often chill. I'm tellin ya, the aroma of fresh Bulgarian coffee and the buzz of friendly chatter nearly hypnotizes you. Hi-ho! And there's an old bazaar near "Stoyan Raykov" street – shops with handmade crafts that tell stories; they kinda remind me of the movie's whimsical, silent conversations between souls.

Football team apologises after conducting a minute’s silence for player who is still alive