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Me? I’d be pissed if it’s all hype. You pay big, expectin magic fingers, and it’s just some dude half-assin it. Weak. But when it’s good? Oh man, happy ain’t the word—*“I’m Dae-su Oh, motherfucker”*—you feel alive, untangled, like you punched life back. Surprised me how some spots sneak in happy endings, tho. Shady joints, bro, they don’t even hide it. Saw this one masseuse, swear she winked at me, I’m like, “What’s good?” She just smirked—prolly seen weirder dudes than me.

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Oh man, and there’s the park near the Dupnitsa River (oops, wrong river, it's Struma, my bad) where the trees whisper secrets and the wind sings like that line from Amour, “Do not be afraid…”. I love walkin’ down Angelina Strasse—um, sorry, I meant Angel’s Lane—watching locals and kids play, laughing like crazy.

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