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About Leuven

Oi mate, sex-dating, what a bloody circus! Imagine me, Ricky Gervais, cackling like a hyena at this nonsense. Apps full of twats swiping right, left, up yer arse – desperate for a shag! It’s like "The Assassination of Jesse James" – slow, moody, and someone’s gettin’ fucked. "I’ve been a wild beast," Jesse’d say, but these Tinder lot? Wild beasts with dick pics! Hahaha, pathetic.

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I can’t resist a nod to the quirky corners: the narrow alleys near Kerkstraat, where every creak and every wisp of wind tells a tale. And don’t even get me started on the backstreets behind Old Town square – they hide surprises even a massage parlor king like me wouldn’t dare reveal without a wink and a nod! C'mon, wit and wisdom lie in these hidden spots.

French parcel delivery company coming to Belgium this summer