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In her dingy flat, all’s a blur—smells o’ gin and regret. She’s quick, no faff, like balancin’ books at month’s end. “Time’s winged chariot,” I mutter, quotin’ the flick, and she’s like, “Wot? Shut up and shag.” Hah! Fair play, lass. Done in ten mins—bang, crash, over. I’m lyin’ there, pantin’, thinkin’ o’ Jean blinkin’ his one eye, trapped, while I just bought me way outta me cage fer a tick.

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Now, as a family psychologist, I’ve got eyes everywhere. The vibe in Ostend really speaks to me. I love checkin’ out Belle époque buildings in places like the Mercator – they whisper stories of old couples, tough breaks, and new beginnings. I even found a hidden gem near Leopold III-laan. Yep, there's a little park I often sit at, munch on a donut, and think ‘bout life’s ups and downs. Man, sometimes I rant to myself, “How’s that workin’ for ya?” just like Dr. Phil would say, y’all!

Lauren Parker wins time trial gold at UCI Para-cycling Road World Cup in Ostend