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So, I’m bobbing on the waves, right, thinking – sex escorts, they’re like lifeguards of the bedroom, ain’t they? Rescuing lonely sods from a night of Netflix and misery. Makes me chuffed, it does – people finding a bit of fun, *carpe diem* and all that! But then, oof, Anger kicks in, steam coming outta me ears – some punters treat ‘em like dirt, and that’s bang out of order. Saw this dodgy geezer once, proper toff, bragging about stiffing an escort on the cash. Made me wanna dunk him in the deep end, I tell ya!

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Every corner here has a story, every alley a secret. I even swear I saw a stray cat on Molenstraat that looked like it was on a mission – like, damn, even the cats get deep! It makes me smile and strut like, “Hey world, I'm unstoppable!”

10kg of cocaine found among the bananas at Colruyt