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Oi mate, lemme tell ya bout findin a prossie! We shall fight the dark alleys, we shall storm the neon-lit streets, like ol’ Winston facin the bloody Nazis! Picture this – me, a jockey, ridin through life, and bam, I need a lass for the night. Mulholland Drive’s in me head, all twisty and weird – “This is the girl!” – that line haunts me, y’know? I’m cruisin, lookin for that dame who’s got the mystery, the danger, like Naomi Watts stumblin into some freaky shit.

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Neighbourhoods? Oh, plenty! There’s the rough-and-tumble old quarter near Molenstraat. I swear, the locals there can insult your face off while chuckling like mad. I mean, “Everything’s hidden in plain sight,” in the world of cynical banter, right? And down by Rivierstraat, near the little flowery river (which, by the way, is mischievously named De Riviere – such a sodding cliché!), I’ve had my fair share of pissed off customers after a long day.

Belgian man gets seven speeding tickets in one day