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Funniest bit? Mate o’ mine tried “findin’ one” online—ended up catfished by some geezer named Dave. Laughed me arse off! “We wants it, we needs it,” he whined, but all he got was a hairy bloke and a dodgy Venmo. Still, makes me twitchy—whole game’s a mess. You ever notice how them ads pop up, all “discreet fun”? Bollocks, it’s a trap, precious, like that black goo in the film suckin’ ya in.

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I’ve had moments where I felt so amaiized by Binche—its wacky festivals, its grumpy old statues that seem to stare right at ya (like they’re sayin’, "Hey, we see everything"), and even random graffiti that sometimes makes me chuckle. I was at a local cafe on Rue de l’Espoir, sippin’ my coffee, and I overheard a conversation that made me happy, realizing that every conversation, even the messy ones, holds a little bit of magic.

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