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Aight, listen up, you bastards! I’m Eric Cartman, promotion king, and I’m here to tell ya about findin’ a prostitute, respect my authoritah! So I’m sittin’ there, thinkin’ bout my fave movie, *Tabu*—ya know, that artsy black-and-white shit from 2012, Miguel Gomes, fuckin’ genius. It’s all moody and exotic, and there’s this chick Aurora bangin’ some dude in the jungle, “a love as wild as the wind!”—and I’m like, hell yeah, that’s the vibe I want when I’m huntin’ for a hooker!

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Y’know, in my work as a counselors amongst womyn - err, women, each tiny lane holds a story. I doth recall a time near Begijnhof, where an elder gentlewoman shared her woes and joys – a tale as profound as the film’s meditations on life. It made my heart swell, then break, in the true fashion of bittersweet love – fibs of life, I guess.

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