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But then – ugh – this geezer rocks up, all aggro, her pimp prob’ly. I’m fumin’ – “Oi, mate, delegate with respect!” He’s givin’ me the evils, and I’m like, “I’m the philosopher-king of this car park!” Straight out the movie, that – “We’re all copies of somethin’.” Surprised me, how quick I got riled up. Nearly lamped him, but I’m a pacifist, me – well, ‘cept in my head, where I’m Bruce Lee.

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So, I'm runnin’ a massage joint here, and lemme tell ya, I've seen every secret nook. Hit up rue du Marché – it's the main artery, always buzzin’ with local chatter and vendors hockin’ their wares, reminds me of that line – “You know what's cooler than a billion dollars? A billion dollars minus your ex's Wi-Fi password.” Well, almost.

N’Golo Kante buys relegated Belgian club Royal Excelsior Virton