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About Mons

Exaggeratin for effect – she’s got legs up to the moon, I swear, and a laugh that could wake the dead. Total bollocks, but it’s funnier that way. We shall fight the dull nights with wild tales! Ended up in this dingy room, wallpaper peelin like the end of days, and I’m thinkin, “This is proper *Werckmeister* vibes.” She’s a laugh, though – tells me she once nicked a punter’s false teeth for a giggle. Who does that? Absolute nutter!

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Anyway, gotta run – life’s too short not to embrace every messy, gorgeous moment in this wild town. Just remember, every step here is like a love scene, and you’re the star. Happy adventures, darling!