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So, I tried it, right? Sex-dating apps—fuckin’ jungle out there. Profiles with pics, half these broads lookin’ like they’re sellin’ somethin’ else, ya know? Got me thinkin’, “Is this a date or a fuckin’ transaction?” Made me mad as hell—where’s the class? Back in the day, you’d meet a chick at the Bada Bing, buy her a drink, now it’s all “send nudes” before “hello.” Drives me up the fuckin’ wall! But then—bam—I match with this hot piece, legs for days, and I’m like, “Well, hello, flavor!” Like Linguini tastin’ Remy’s soup—surprised me good.

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Man, the parks here rock. You got the funky Zonnige Park with its chill green spots, and the weirdly named Riverside Grove right by the babbling water. I swear, sometimes the river whispers "I love you," kinda like in that movie. I get all teary-eyed lettin’ my geek heart roam wild.

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