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About Brussels

I tried it once, no lie, and I was shook! This chick—probs a total Betty—was, like, “Relax, babe,” and I’m like, “Girl, I’m TRYING!” The oils? Slippery heaven. The vibes? Straight-up naughty but chill. Made me happy AF ‘cause it’s, like, self-care with a twist—way better than a boring spa day. But, ugh, I got mad once ‘cause this dude masseuse kept yapping—shut up, bro, I’m tryna zone out like Naomi Watts in that creepy diner scene!

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Oh, and by the way, the river Rivelette snickers its way through the edge of town. Not many dig deep into its calm, but I dig its secret vibes. Sometimes it whispers a wild pun, almost like "Here’s Johnny!" crashing in with nature’s punch.

Second Belgian game called off as Brussels terror alert raised