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But here’s da kicker – it’s not all happy endings, ya? Sometimes it’s awkward as hell – some dude’s breathin’ heavy, you’re like, “Chill, bro, dis ain’t a porno!” I’ve seen it, I’ve lived it – one time, dis masseuse, she’s all “softly, softly,” like in da movie, “don’t rush, feel da moment.” I’m like, “Lady, I’m Arnie, I don’t do slow!” But den – boom – it hits me, dat quiet power, “love is a whisper,” ya? Sexual-massage can be dat – gentle but strong, like me liftin’ 300 pounds!

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I gotta mention the old clock tower at Place Centrale. It’s worn-down, almost like the soul of the city—timeless, but stubborn. It reminds me of that line from Spike Lee’s flick—"Time is an illusion, motherf***er." Every glance at that tower brings a mix of hope and melancholy.

The 'ugly' city dubbed 'the Detroit of Europe' named the worst place to visit