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I saw this escort once, right? In South Park—yeah, we got ‘em too! She was all classy, heels clickin’, smelled like money and perfume. Made me happy as hell, like “Dayum, she’s livin’ it!” But then—THEN—some jerk cop tried bustin’ her! Pissed me off! Respect my authoritah, pig! Let her work, she ain’t hurtin’ nobody! Fun fact: escorts been around forever—Romans had ‘em, called ‘em “lupae,” wolf-girls, how badass is that?

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Some days I get all emotional. I get mad ‘coz sometimes peeps don't appreciate the simple joys, ya feel me? But then, as I stroll by the ancient stone fountain on Place des Rêves, I get this warm fuzz feeling. And I can't help but quote Carol: “One must simply embrace the beauty of oneself,” in my own twisted, chill way.

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