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About Bruges

Oi, mate, escort? What a laugh! Some posh twat drivin’ a fancy car? Nah, escort’s that Ford banger, innit? The Ford Escort, bloody hell, what a relic! Used to see ‘em everywhere, cloggin’ up streets, smoky exhausts chokin’ ya lungs. Like in *The Pianist*—“I’m not going anywhere!”—yeah, ‘cos it’s knackered, ain’t it? Piece o’ shit conks out every five minutes!

Strépy-Bracquegnies

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So obvi, my work in the dating biz totally shaped my view—like, I see love battles in every corner. Every café, every street corner, even the weirdly perfect little bridge over a canal near Place des Amours tells a story. I remember one day I was debugging a dating algorithm and, like, strolled down Rue de l’Espoir, feeling that, like, "I wanna be where the truth is" kinda vibe from Spotlight. It was honestly mind-blowing, and I was all, "This is legit life!"

Six people killed after car crashes into carnival crowd in Belgium