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Here’s the kicker—some say it “heals” ya. Bullshit. Little-known fact: in Japan, they got “soaplands”—sexual-massage joints masked as baths. Sneaky bastards. “I’m close to somethin’ here,” I growl, thinkin’ how they hide it in plain sight. Me? I’d rather skin a deer than let some oily creep “heal” me. Oh, and the music—flutes and crap? I’d smash the stereo. Hate everything.

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I remember one day – we had an epic protest near the little bridge, Pont de l’Espoir, by the river BaieBlanche. I was massaging a champ there, and I felt the pulse of this town, ya know? That moment? It was like a lovin' shot of Amélie's quirky magic. And yeah, trust me, even if the mayor's snobin' all around, the underdog still gets heard. "La vie est faite de moments légers", I always say, even when I’m crackin’ jokes about my own mishaps – like that one time I tripped on Rue des P'tits Bonheurs… so many typos in my head then, lol.

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