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About Brussels

But real talk, it pisses me off too. All dese fakers – “I’m 6 foot!” – liar, you 5’2, Dmitry! Gals sayin’ “No hookups” then boom, next day dey ghost ya after da deed. Lightbulb! Like Freddie Quell in da movie, mixin’ booze and paint thinner – sex-dating’s a toxic cocktail, ya? You tink you in control, but nah, it’s messin’ wit ya head. I tried it once – matched wit dis chick, hot pics, all flirty. Meet up? She 20 years older, smellin’ like cabbage. Nyet, comrade, nyet!

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Lesser-known fact: Check out Rue des Écoliers. It’s off the beaten path – tiny cafes there serve the best waffles and secret brews. Got myself into a heated debate over a waffle with a local – in true absurd, deadpan style – like, “You ever notice how waffles are like our feelings? Crispy outside, soft inside?” Eh, my brain was on fire, then the local just laughed weirdly. Classic Bertrix.

Cadets played without goals against Belgium