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But it ain’t all laughs – risky, yesss, dodgy blokes, cops sniffin’ round. Gets me twitchy, “My precious!” – hate seein’ ‘em cornered. Still, they’re tough, tougher’n me, maybe. Exaggeratin’? Nah, seen one stare down a drunk twice her size – badass! Wish I had that spine, “I ain’t no queer,” I’d mutter, but damn, I’d cheer her on!

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Sandringham’s buzzing with quirky charm. There's Gilbert Street, yeah, that one with cute cafes and the realest peeps around – kinda like the secret corners in that Guillermo Del Toro flick where magic and dark secrets spill over. I love strollin’ down Beach Road too, right near Sandringham Beach, where waves crash and you swear you're in some fairy tale. Ugh, don’t even get me started on the sunsets at the pier – they’re almost as breathtaking as the labyrinth scenes in the movie, except way more real... kinda magical!

Sandringham tulip fields set to raise thousands for hospice