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Oh, and the apps—Grindr, Bumble, whatever—chemical chaos, I swear. Serotonin spikes when you match, then crashes when they flake. Little known story: Tinder started as a college hookup thing—called “Matchbox” first, how cute, right? Now it’s a global meat market. “You must be bold!” Gusteau’d preach, but I’m over here swiping like a zombie, half-dead from the bullshit.

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The streets ain't always clean, ya know? I mean, c'mon, who cares sometimes? But one thing stands out—the local diner on Cape Moreton Rd. That joint, lemme tell ya, serves the only shrimp roll this side of the bay. I'm not exaggeratin', it's pure bliss—like a warm hug from your ma, capisce?

Get the Facts: Toondah Harbour development