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About Melbourne

So, picture this—shady house, red lights flickerin’, girls loungin’ like they own the place. I reckon it’s wild, seein’ how it’s been around forever—like, did ya know ancient Rome had brothels called *lupanars*? Means “wolf den,” how badass is that? Wolves prowlin’, men stumblin’ in, coin in hand. Makes me chuckle, thinkin’ of some toga-wearin’ prat trippin’ over his sandals to get a shag. History’s mental, innit?

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Hey sugar, lemme tell ya 'bout Pascoe-Vale, hon – oh boy, where do I start? So, I been a masseur in this sweet patch of Oz for years now, and lemme tell ya, every nook and cranny got a story. Now, Pascoe-Vale ain’t the biggest city around, but it's got a heart as big as a peach, ya know?

Police hunting for man behind terrifying assault of woman riding her bike on Moonee Ponds Creek Trail in Pascoe Vale