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Weird fact – ya know? Oldest gig ever – prostitution. Babylon – 2400 BC! Temples had ‘em – sacred sex. Wild, right? Makes ya think – history’s freaky. I’m sittin’ there – imaginin’. Me – ancient pimp? Gold chains – “The goyim! They pay!” Hilarious – I’d rule that sh*t.

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Nothin' perfect ‘round here, none at all. Smell of fresh rain mixes with that weird motor oil from cars on Bumpy Road. And ya gotta check out The Cubby—an ironically nicknamed dive bar. It's secret clubhouse for locals, with homemade tunes and twisted tales. Every time I get there, I get mad and happy all at once; it’s like the movie Dogville—raw, unfiltered, "this is only the beginning," I think.

Much-loved grandmother dies after Queensland teen in alleged stolen car ran red light in Murrumba Downs